Jealousy - The End of a Relationship
If you have experienced jealousy in a relationship then you know how hard it can be to deal with. This article will give you some insight into jealousy and how to handle it.
Jealousy in relationships is one emotion that can entirely and wholly captivate your mind; a mind that is stuck with feelings of low self-esteem, self-worth and mistrust. Jealousy hides you away from reality and possesses your mind in a manner which defies all sense of rational thinking.
So, when you ask your husband why he was late from work, you are watching him intently to see if he is lying and you wonder if he is having an affair with the secretary, if you are good enough to compete with her, whether she stayed at your place when you were visiting family and if he is contemplating divorce since he is lusting for somebody else. Plus you think of all this in the fraction of a second he takes to answer your question; the worse being you believe most if not all of what you are thinking regardless of his answer.
The reasons for being so possessive and having jealousy in your relationships could stem from your childhood traumas; most of us who are obsessively jealous have had a childhood which imprinted deception and betrayal onto our beings. Emotional wounds are caused by any kind of a physical or psychological abuse or an overly dominated childhood. Insecurities that you felt as a child gradually set in till you get into your teens and add to the low self-worth, these deny a healthy adult relationship as well. Most marriages break-up owing to jealousy and stifling possessive behavior from one of the partners, though with increasing information and openness to therapies, the situation is changing. With a supportive partner, you can be helped into talking about your past and cleanse your mind gradually of self-depreciating feelings. Child sexual abuse, especially by a person the child trusted wholeheartedly often sets off such feelings of being used in adulthood.
Deep emotional wounds send a person into prisons of fear and weakness that they carry with them all their lives; the fear of losing a loved one and of not being good enough to be loved. It is important that these feelings are identified and dealt with to allow the jealous partner a chance to breathe again and allow a happy and healthy relationship. Remember not to look out to the world for answers when you figure out that the jealousy in your relationship is ruining your love life. Begin looking within yourself to find where the hurt lays and get professional help to deal with it. Strengthen your inner self and all relationship issues can be solved with time.